Mr. & Mrs. Smith
Directed by: Doug Liman
Written By: Simon Kinberg
Staring: Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Vince Vaughn
Rated: PG-13

Mr. & Mrs. Smith is the kind of film that happens when an action flick, lonely
and drunk on Jager, depressed from striking out all night and just barely able
to stand runs into a self conscious, awkward, but attractive, light romantic 
comedy in the back room of a smoky bar. Maybe there's Dire Straits or Kenny 
Loggins on the jukebox, but most likely it's Barry White, and that's when 
things take a turn for the funky.

The result is that Hollywood can now, finally, stop making movies.  They've 
solved the equation, balanced out both sides, cross-canceled and simplified. 
In short they have found the lowest common denominator.  Of course, they won't
stop. Now they can just apply the formula in all sorts of 'witty' and 
'intriguing' ways - or - for the extremely creative, they'll just insert the
sexy hot star of the moment.  The work is done, now it's just time to sit back 
and reap the benefits.
 
That isn't to say that the film isn't a good time, because it is. We all know
my weakness for the light romantic comedy is only tempered by my love of action
flicks so this film seems to have been made directly for me. I didn't even mind
the fact that it starred Angelina Jolie as Jane Smith. For many, that's a
selling point - me, I wish she'd crawl back into the pile of dung that spawned
her. Brad Pitt, on the other hand, as John Smith is right up my alley. Aside
from 1994 (which brought us Interview With The Vampire and Legends Of The Fall)
his career has been filled with great roles. 

The plot is pretty straight forward, and we like it that way dammit. Boy and 
girl meet while both trying to hide from the police. Boy and Girl don't
realize that they're both assassins so they have a sham wedding; each thinking
the other is their cover. They settle down and each pursues their own killing 
career and get more and more bored with each other. Eventually the two get
called to the same hit and the whole tissue of lies gets crumpled up, matted 
with blood and blown to smithereens. It is here that we see what ever Hollywood
couple is missing from their relationship, a prolonged knock down drag out
medieval fight that ranges throughout their whole perfect little house smashing
it to pieces. I believe that this is a lesson to be learned by all not just
Hollywood couples. It's perhaps intentional that the film begins with the 
couple in marriage counseling when; really all they needed to do was spend half
an hour beating the shit out of each other! To think, all that money wasted. 
But don't think it ends there - after the makeup sex, it's time to go get the 
real bad guys. What real bad guys? Well, I'd hate to spoil the "surprise". 

The only downside to being manipulated as I was with this film was the fact 
that I realized it - while I was watching. The director Doug Liman who brought
us the Borne Identity films (and little else) was successful in those films 
because the audience was supposed to feel alien and aloof sort of like Jason 
Borne. John and Jane are very passionate their work (and each other) being 
withdrawn from that makes it difficult to keep our minds and senses in the film.

And would someone, please, STOP HIRING VINCE VAUGHN? That's right, he adds no 
value to this film, AGAIN. He gets set up through the whole film to either be 
the villain or the comes-through-in-the-end friend and he ends up as just being
written out all together. Sure, he has a couple of good lines and his character
is funny enough, but he's not around enough to be the comic relief and the film 
didn't need it anyway.

Overall the movie is a great time and should work out well for dates, I 
encourage all to try their therapy techniques (specifically the exploding gas 
line) to work out the problems in your relationship. If you don't think you 
have problems in your relationship, wait until she sees the look on your face
when Angelina Jolie steps into the dominatrix outfit... Enjoy!

Mr. & Mrs. Smith opens Nationwide Friday June 10th

Dave can be reached at dkerr@detroitbuzz.com