Hide and Seek

The parade of mediocrity continues! Meet our soon to be terrorized family: The 
Callaways. David (De Niro) and Alison Callaway and their daughter Emily (the 
ubiquitous Dakota Fanning) seem to be having some problems. We're not 
exactly sure what those are to begin with but, lucky us, we're exposed to them 
via (sigh) progressive dream sequence flashbacks throughout the film. Alison is 
very depressed, with good reason - A leading role in this film would be enough 
to drive anyone over the edge - but she manages to get out of the film while 
the getting's good, via bathtub and razor bladeÉ 

Emily, naturally, is having some problems coping with mommy's death. But no 
fear, her dad's a well off psychologist and like all good doctors, when he 
finds that a very close family member needs help, he takes it upon himself to
treat her.  He packs up their belongings, rips her from everything she knows
and moves the family to upstate New York. And that's where Charlie shows up. 

Charlie is Emily's imaginary friend and like Jody of Amityville fame he starts
off as a fun, harmless and safe play friend - but quickly moves into a 
terrorizing, murderous monster. But unfortunately, unlike Jody, Charlie is not
a large ghostly pig monster. 

Fox went to great lengths to protect the twist ending of this movie, to the 
point that they shipped the final reel separately, chained to a security guard
and individually numbered. I think that was a good idea. Most of my animosity
for this film comes from the fact that the "twist" ending is very predictable,
nonsensical (in a bad way) oh yeah, and dumb. But it leaves me with hope. 
Maybe, just maybe, there is a silver lining. Maybe I didn't get to see the 
real ending, maybe an additional security measure was put in place and I got
to see the chump ending. I certainly hope so, All the elements are there for a
really good ending: we have a dirty, maybe perverted, neighbor, a deranged
little girl, a creepy cave in the woods and of course Bobby D. The lead up 
wasn't spectacular but really, in a good horror film, spectacular is reserved
for the end.

Assuming that the end stays the same, definitely give this one a miss. If you 
need to see some sort of horror produced by the Fox network then stay home 
and watch American Idol, you'll be much more satisfied.
 

Starring: Robert De Niro, Famke Janssen, Dakota Fanning and Elisabeth Shue
Directed By: John Polson
Rated: R (violence, language)
Hide and Seek opens Friday January 28th

Dave can be reached at dkerr@detroitbuzz.com